Are you lonely and longing for a good relationship? To have a loving partner to share your life with is not only important in living a meaningful life but also essential in living a long and healthy life. And it’s quite possible to find love and have a partner at any age. But making this happen - finding the right person and then creating a good relationship which actually grows deeper and more intimate over time, is often the hard part.
Finding that special someone isn’t just about getting out on the dating scene. It begins with self-assessment and then advances with a clear plan and the right attitude. The first step is to ask yourself whether you are currently in a healthy emotional state - a state that will make you desirable (and we are not tallking about looks) to the type of person you would like to have as a partner.
Perhaps, deep down, you have almost given up. What you may really be saying to yourself is, ‘Maybe this is my lot in life, to be alone.’ But if opportunities for a relationship are not offering themselves in your life, it isn’t a sign that you have to soldier on alone for ever. It may actually point to the fact that there’s something amiss with your thinking or self-perception.
Perhaps you are still stuck from your last relationship breakup and loss. Perhaps you feel residual anger, mistrust, or self-doubt. Underneath the desperation to find someone, you may really feel:
stuck in painful events from the past and unable to get free and move on without help
that successful relationships are for other people, not you
too unattractive to be loved or with rock-bottom confidence
unable to open up and be intimate with someone new
it's all too hard
Another huge challenge in finding a relationship that really works is how to pick a good partner. We may tend to seek partners primarily on the basis of immediate physical attraction, which doesn’t last. We may seek partners who compensate for us in some way, an approach that can lead to a risky form of dependency. We may take on partners who makes us feel safe because their capability is less than ours, but with whom we soon become impatient or dissatisfied. We may even seek out damaged partners because we believe we can heal them and they will need us, where in time they become resentful or we find our own deeper needs are not being met. Click here to read on Relationships and Coupling.
How Relationship Counselling For Singles Help
Counselling can provide an insightful and sensitive setting for you to explore the areas which may be preventing you from moving on in your life and finding love. In counselling we can become aware of our own deep wounds and what really drives us, helping us to become much more conscious and able to make positive choices and take action that will create the results we actually want. One major area individual counselling explores is emotions. We have found, many single people, over time have disconnected from their emotions. Probably for very good reasons at stages of loss and rejection but totally unhelpful now when you want to find love. Others may say they are 'emotional' but not know how to use the 'data' their emotions provide to pick the right partner. Having a good understanding of EQ and how emotions matter allows you to date and eventually partner successfully.
No matter how much loneliness you are experiencing now and however disappointed you are in, don’t give up just yet. As psychotherapists and counsellors we are experienced at helping single people like you who are longing to find that special someone. We help you get ‘relationship ready’ and then provide the nurture and guidance for you to be able to find and create a relationship with someone that lasts.
In relationship counselling for singles, you can achieve honest answers to questions such as:
Do I really want a relationship or am I doing what I think I’m supposed to?
Why do I seem to repeat the same or similiar patterns in relationships?
Does my relationship history dictate my future?
What kind of person do I want to form a relationship with?
Am I being too picky but in reality being picky is a form of self protection?
What do I have to offer a potential relationship partner?
Is there something inherently wrong with me that keeps me single?
Where can I find the kind of person I’d like to be with?
You can also understand deeper emotions, such as fear of rejection, that may be blocking you from moving forward. Fear of rejection is a major deterrent to pursuing a new relationship because it touches the most vulnerable parts of being human - the fear that we are somehow unacceptable or unlovable. The finest antidote to fear is to expose its roots and assess the realities behind it. We can help you:
heal old wounds and get ready to find new love
improve your ability to be sexually and physically intimate with a loved one
increase your self-esteem and feel good about how you look, your age and what you have to offer
learn how to better express love and affection
negotiate the tricky early stages of dating and creating a good relationship
resolve your fears about being close to someone and learn how to safely open up and let someone in
If you are becoming disillusioned or desperate because you can’t find love and all your attempts to connect seem destined to fail, leaving you feeling worse about yourself than before, it's time get in touch.
Here at All Relationship Matters we are relationship specialists. We have helped many singles partner into good, lasting long term relationships. Our counsellors, psychotherapist and psychologists can provide you with the supportive but gently challenging environment, where you can be open and honest enough to find what’s really holding you back, resolve residual issues from the past, and learn new skills about taking positive action so that the world opens up for you and your hopes and dreams for a good relationship can finally become a reality.
Give us a call 0400 999 918 for a confidential chat or send us an email to begin finding love now.